every day I come on substack and am given another reason to delete Instagram forever. your thoughts here are so good, I was JUST talking to a close friend yesterday about how love in the past used to be so much purer, that we wish we still wrote letters and made phone calls, that we could just show up at someone's house (without seeming like a creep).
I love this post! You articulate so well that we are more than the thirst traps we post online. I've learned if a guy only likes your story when you post yourself, he primarily only has lustful feelings towards you - even if you just posted a selfie. And usually the types that like your story and never message, or barely reply if you message them, are liking a lot of other girls' stories. It's not to say you can't genuinely connect with someone online, but you have to carefully vet them to make sure they don't only want "one thing" unless of course you only want a casual relationship with them.
gods this was so fucking good thank you. i've only dated from dating apps and every few months people would come back to my insta and like my stories or my post but won't deign to send me a message. This is an immediate block from me. we all deserve better than people who just like our story from the toilet seat. thank you
Why I post is for myself (going very off from what this substack is for but hear me out)
Now I have this separate account on Instagram no one knows about. I upload posts, stories, reels, etc and treat the comments a journal for myself (i know physical journals are better but I feel more comfortable this way and there a lot more I can do like this, personal choice). I have highlights of myself to songs that I love that I keep re watching like I have a crush of myself. It’s very therapeutic. If you find Instagram hard to quit, try something like this because it won’t fire your brain with over stimuli and genuinely bring you peace and calm.
i don't know whether to scream over what thoughts you're displaying or the beauty with which you articulate them wowwwww. awkward teenage girl here GUILTY of posting my thirst traps as a way to feel desired and appreciated. it's really time to not only take the social/romantic connotation of a simple story like but also stop making ourselves palatable for the sake of very empty praise. thank you for writing this!!
You´re so right, especially with the quote of The perks of being a wallflower, "we accept the love we think we deserve"; Since I read the book, there has not been a moment in my life in which I do not remember this phrase, but even so I have gotten carried away by waiting for a like from some boy or uploading something just for him to see it, it is so real how social networks have stolen romanticism, I suppose it is up to us to uproot ourselves from that. And start setting our standards higher, to know that we deserve more.
That’s exactly why I decided to delete my ex (we broke up in good terms) from my followers everywhere. Because these days you see every action as a sign for something. If he ever wants to come back or talk, he will do it like a normal person. Not through stupid and confusing signs. Be direct and real.
i love this. this is what we live for!!! i'm such a romantic in every sense. i will buy my friends gifts for no reason, i will pay for their things without expecting them to repay me—and everytime, they are surprised. we need to bring back romance, caring, loving, and all things that we live for! things that make us human!
WOWWW this resonated with me so much!! Recently, I’ve been reflecting on my relationship with social media and if I’m truly posting for connection or simply to be seen. You articulated this so beautifully.
Your points are so true that I really enjoyed this text. It is very sad that we are allowing certain algorithms to control our relationships, love, and communication with other people, but we can and should restore our fundamental qualities of presence, softness, love, and communication. Thank your for sharing this!
because it is emberassing for your love story to be a social media meet, wtf do you mean i liked you because of that story you posted? wtf do you mean you're throwing hints by liking stories of the person you like?
every day I come on substack and am given another reason to delete Instagram forever. your thoughts here are so good, I was JUST talking to a close friend yesterday about how love in the past used to be so much purer, that we wish we still wrote letters and made phone calls, that we could just show up at someone's house (without seeming like a creep).
honestly yes can we please normalise pulling up to doorsteps and confessing our love again
like honestly that would make my life better
I love this post! You articulate so well that we are more than the thirst traps we post online. I've learned if a guy only likes your story when you post yourself, he primarily only has lustful feelings towards you - even if you just posted a selfie. And usually the types that like your story and never message, or barely reply if you message them, are liking a lot of other girls' stories. It's not to say you can't genuinely connect with someone online, but you have to carefully vet them to make sure they don't only want "one thing" unless of course you only want a casual relationship with them.
so correctly put! we’ve been thrust into the horror of social media romance and i hope we all escape it immediately
gods this was so fucking good thank you. i've only dated from dating apps and every few months people would come back to my insta and like my stories or my post but won't deign to send me a message. This is an immediate block from me. we all deserve better than people who just like our story from the toilet seat. thank you
CACKLING at the toilet seat bit why is that so hilarious. and real! hoping you get lots of organic connections this year ❤️
this was seriously a wake up call thank you. time to redirect my energy into pursuing love grounded in the reality of my existence 💋
IM GLAD! you deserve nothing more <3
Why I post is for myself (going very off from what this substack is for but hear me out)
Now I have this separate account on Instagram no one knows about. I upload posts, stories, reels, etc and treat the comments a journal for myself (i know physical journals are better but I feel more comfortable this way and there a lot more I can do like this, personal choice). I have highlights of myself to songs that I love that I keep re watching like I have a crush of myself. It’s very therapeutic. If you find Instagram hard to quit, try something like this because it won’t fire your brain with over stimuli and genuinely bring you peace and calm.
such an awesome idea thank you for sharing!!!
i don't know whether to scream over what thoughts you're displaying or the beauty with which you articulate them wowwwww. awkward teenage girl here GUILTY of posting my thirst traps as a way to feel desired and appreciated. it's really time to not only take the social/romantic connotation of a simple story like but also stop making ourselves palatable for the sake of very empty praise. thank you for writing this!!
realll!! i am so guilty of the things i talk about in this post but self awareness is the first step queen
You´re so right, especially with the quote of The perks of being a wallflower, "we accept the love we think we deserve"; Since I read the book, there has not been a moment in my life in which I do not remember this phrase, but even so I have gotten carried away by waiting for a like from some boy or uploading something just for him to see it, it is so real how social networks have stolen romanticism, I suppose it is up to us to uproot ourselves from that. And start setting our standards higher, to know that we deserve more.
thank u so much for reading mia and for this really profound comment
Reading this was like sharing a single strand of spaghetti with a lover who wears epiphanies like a silk dress
erica i’m hoping that’s a compliment but also what a delightful way to put that
10000% a compliment — just painting the picture hehe
framing this comment thanks and love you 🩷
That’s exactly why I decided to delete my ex (we broke up in good terms) from my followers everywhere. Because these days you see every action as a sign for something. If he ever wants to come back or talk, he will do it like a normal person. Not through stupid and confusing signs. Be direct and real.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
i love this. this is what we live for!!! i'm such a romantic in every sense. i will buy my friends gifts for no reason, i will pay for their things without expecting them to repay me—and everytime, they are surprised. we need to bring back romance, caring, loving, and all things that we live for! things that make us human!
thank you for sharing this to the world!
you seem like the sweetest person!!! love in human form 🩷
So true bestie
thank you my bestie
WOWWW this resonated with me so much!! Recently, I’ve been reflecting on my relationship with social media and if I’m truly posting for connection or simply to be seen. You articulated this so beautifully.
thank you so much melissa!! i hope you figure it all out
this healed smth within me. you wrote everything that was in my mind so clearly and i couldn’t agree more. i love this! 🥹💕
thank you sm for the kind words tanisha <3
Your points are so true that I really enjoyed this text. It is very sad that we are allowing certain algorithms to control our relationships, love, and communication with other people, but we can and should restore our fundamental qualities of presence, softness, love, and communication. Thank your for sharing this!
thank you so much for this heartfelt comment and for reading <3
because it is emberassing for your love story to be a social media meet, wtf do you mean i liked you because of that story you posted? wtf do you mean you're throwing hints by liking stories of the person you like?
Viva la revolution!
The revolution of our generation turning our backs to the incessant chatter of smart phones and RETURNING to our humanity!!